"All extremists should be taken out and shot. "

 "If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments."

 "Obviously the only rational solution to your problem is suicide."

 " Join the Army! Travel to exotic, distant lands. Meet exciting, unusual people, and kill them."

 "Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy."

 " Monday is a hard way to spend one-seventh of your life. "

" There are many things in life....that will catch your eye, but only a few will catch your heart.......pursue those."

" Reality is the only obstacle to happiness."

" God will not look you over for medals, degrees, or diplomas, but for scars."

" Judge a man by the reputation of his enemies."

" You can quicker gain back a million dollars you lost then just one word you gave away."

" You don't love someone because they are beautiful; they are beautiful because you love them."

" Memorize quotes. They're useful in ending and winning arguments. Then again, so are semi-automatic weapons."

" I think that God in creating man somewhat overestimated his ability."